I got a frantic call from one of my preggie friends (let's call her 'S')...I present the conversation below:
S (really flustered): 'Yaar do you know any place where I can get some good posters?'
Me (amused): 'Kaun se hero ka chahiye hai? (which actor's poster do you want?)'
S (irritated): 'yahaan hum pareshaan ho rahe hain aur tumhe mazaak soojh raha hai....please help me find some good posters of cute babies'
Me (still amused): 'arre yaar...you are going to have a baby of your own...why do you need posters?'
At this point, S decided that she had to tell me the story from the beginning to make me understand the gravity of the situation. Her mother had told her about a month ago (on phone) to put up some posters of cute babies on all the walls of her room...so that they could be seen from every position (lying, sitting, waking up etc) and S had apparently convinced her mom that her room had been converted into an exhibition of cute babies...Now her mom was going to visit in person and S needed to cover up her lies and get at least 1-2 baby posters!! So the conversation continues:
Me: 'aaaaaaaah!! why did you lie to aunty?'
S: 'Would you like to cover all the four walls of your room with baby posters?'
Me (shuddering at the possibility and avoiding to answer): 'Actually........why are cute baby posters soooooo important?'
S (with her patience completely lost): 'arre my mom was saying that if you keep looking at beautiful children and cute babies when you're pregnant, your baby will also be cute'
Me (screaming): 'No!!!!!!!'
S (brimming with satisfaction at being understood at last): 'Yes!!!...and the problem is that my mom firmly believes in this theory!! so will you please stop talking and help me get a few posters....she's arriving tonight'
Me (laughing): 'S, didn't you explain to aunty that heredity also plays a small role...and that you and cuteness are opposite things so if you consider the genetics of the situation...(pause)...haan but R is quite cute so there is still a possibility of your baby inheriting some cuteness from him (referring to her husband)!!
S (fuming): will you stop your nonsense (bakwaas band karo) and help me get some posters...uff!!
So after this conversation, both of us and our husbands and a few more friends began our search for baby posters (me from my house - remember doc advised rest - thank God or who-so-ever for internet)...First we looked for 'Archies' or 'Hallmark' shops which used to be the best place for getting cards/posters/gifts when we were teenagers. We were shocked to find that these shops have almost but disappeared (they are now online!!). One or two that remain on ground have stocked a lot of useless gifts like show-pieces...and very few cards (I guess everybody wishes each other on Facebook nowadays...who needs paper cards?)...and no posters (as you have your desktop background that you can change whenever you want)!!! So, no luck there...
We thought of getting poster size prints of some Anne Geddes baby photos (which in my opinion are beautiful!!)...but that was too expensive and we did not get any high resolution photo on the internet....plus we had no time to order through the internet!!
Finally...somebody found two posters in Sarojini Nagar with colour enhanced green and blue backgrounds behind the babies (very very ghati posters like the ones you get in a mela)...but it was already evening and we had to get S's room ready....So I suggested that they buy a roll of paper tape that doesn't leave any marks on the wall and S could easily take off the posters after aunty's visit!!
Finally aunty arrived and saw the posters and remarked, 'only two posters!!' She had no problem with the jarring colours in the background and the poor quality of the posters as long as the babies were 'cute'...My friend thought it was time to put her foot down and said that two posters were enough to impart sufficient cuteness to her baby!!! Aunty did not argue further but said she'll try and get some more posters in her next visit!!!
Phew!!! All's well that ends well!!
So, you must be thinking what a nice story with a good ending...but this is not the end....The day after this fiasco...I called up my Ma to share this humorous situation...but before I could reach the really funny part, she literally jumped at aunty's idea of 'pregnant women looking at posters of cute babies'...and said 'I think that's a brilliant idea...you also get some posters and put them up...do this immediately!!!'
P.S: So now, when aunty will leave, S will send the posters and paper tape to my house...so that I can put them up when my mom visits next week...
P.P.S: What if they visit at the same time? What if S's mom wishes to come and see me or my mom vice versa?
(S got this brilliant idea of getting her and her husband's childhood photos enlarged into poster size- frame them and put them up...but probably aunty feels that their cuteness quotient is a little low...as compared to poster babies- so she is sending four more posters by courier - expected anytime now!!)
another beautiful Anne Geddes baby poster:
