Krishna - Avatar

the draft of this post was written when I was 8 months pregnant...now my daughter is 8 months old....and I did not get time to edit and post it since then...

It was Krishna's (see photo below) birthday last month i.e.Janamashthami and I received a truckload of blessings from elders. 'S' (my preggie friend I've mentioned before) was also swamped with blessings and got a baby Krishna calender as a bonus!

The only problem I had with these blessings was the assumption that Krishna has nothing else to do in this world but be born as my son!!

and WHY ONLY as a SON!! WHY NOT as a DAUGHTER???

A well-meaning mausi blessed me saying 'murli bajate hue Krishna Bhagwaan aayenge tumhare ghar' (meaning Krishna will be born to you playing his flute)...Now, how on earth am I going to accomplish the task of giving birth to a baby as well as a flute.....Please send in your suggestions..

Plus, I also have a 50-50 possibility of having a daughter - this doesn't occur to people in our son-obsessed country when they bless pregnant women (remember age old blessings like shat-putravati bhav meaning may you have 100 sons - there is no parallel blessing for having a 100 daughters)!!

Don't these people know that the sex of the baby is decided quite instantly after having successful sex for the purpose...and not even a million blessings in the coming months can change the chromosomal design. Brush up your school biology lessons people!! high time!! and wish for the family's health, wealth and wisdom instead..

ok...Let me get on with my friend's story...

Her mom had come to help around the household... For S it meant - good bye to privacy/ decision making/etc...From what to eat through the day...to sleeping postures to political affiliations ( :-D kidding), aunty had ever-ready advice for S.

Let's fast forward to the Janamashthami weekend...Aunty was doing her usual meddling around in the kitchen while S was watching TV. Suddenly the television screen went blank. S looked up to see her mom standing there with hands on her waist staring accusingly at her (imagine a strict primary school teacher who has just caught a toddler drawing on the wall with crayons- that kind of expression)...

Aunty had switched off the TV...you want to know WHY?? 

Because S was watching 'Avatar'!!! For those of you like me and S who could not catch this Oscar nominated movie on the big screen, this Janamashthami weekend came as a pleasant surprise as the film was shown on Star Movies and repeatedly telecast at least 8 times- so you couldn't miss it! BUT, HER MOTHER PROHIBITED HER FROM WATCHING EVEN A TRAILER OF IT

'But Why?', you all must be wondering. Well, Aunty's take on the issue was very scientific - she said, 'yeh kya hain -poonch vaale ajeeb neele neele aadhe jaanvar aadhe insaan - isko dekh ke bachche par galat asar padega' (meaning: what are these weird blue-blue creatures with a tail- half human- half animal- seeing this will be bad for the baby).


(James Cameron will have a fit if he hears this description of the graceful beings his highly-paid design team had created!!) 


S was really pissed when she called me and I gave her really good (I think) arguments to convince aunty...

First idea: I suggested that she should tell aunty that the baby doesn't have X-ray vision so she needn't worry about the bad effect - this idea flopped miserably when S was asked to shut up and listen to some bhajans.


Second Idea: I told S to strongly fight for her right and she did - 'thousands of pregnant women all over the world have seen this movie mummy...you think all their babies have been affected/ deformed...what a ridiculous thi....' of course before she could finish her very emotional outburst, aunty snapped, 'those thousands of women are not my daughters so I don't care!!' 


hmmmmmmmmm...that really was like a final warning from aunty and Avatar had already been shown thrice...we had 5 more chances of convincing aunty


Third/ fourth/Fifth Ideas: Bribery; threats and pleading...all were stonewalled. S called me up, exhausted after the effort and said that aunty had insisted that she watch Ramayan with her and that is what she was going to do....


A bell started ringing in my head!!! She was going to watch Ramayan!! HELLO!! EXCUSE ME!! I was appalled at the double standards of the whole issue... I told S to remind aunty that Ramayan had Hanuman ji who also has a poonch (tail) and  the entire vaanar sena had tails and monkey faces. I asked her to point at the Krishna calender and ask aunty, 'Mummy do you think this is normal skin colour?? Please put on your glasses and see carefully- this colour is 'blue'!!'  And while on this topic, I asked her to rub it in really well- to show aunty images of Ram- blue; Shiv- blue; Vishnu- blue!! Brahma with 4 heads and Durga with 12 hands and Ganesha with elephant head ... ....phew!!!

Blue and White!!

the Avatar look was inspired by figures from Hindu mythology

S, like a good friend followed my advice and told aunty not to be racist and that she had no right to judge people by skin colour; facial features and presence or absence of tails etc..

All in vain....as aunty then used the oldest weapon in the world that can win all battles - tears!!! She put on a miserable expression of shock; sadness; anger- all mixed up. Now, S wanted to tell aunty that such a distorted face of the grandmother would definitely affect the child but checked herself just in time to be saved from being washed away in tears..and said, 'OK Mummy...I won't see it'...(the main reason being that the last and eighth repeat telecast was already half way through)



So S started reading a book...grew bored after reading seven and a half lines...went to check on aunty's mood...

Aunty was watching TV with full concentration (established by her half-open mouth and eyes glued to screen). The tears had vanished as if they had never come. 

On the screen was a woman with a vamp-like smile...wearing bright red lipstick; multi- layered make-up; thick swathes of purple eye liner on the eyelids and thicker swathes of a green one under the eyes...fake eyelashes reaching her chin; fake hair mounted on the top of her head like an inverted ice cream cone....

S instinctively and immediately looked away from the screen...afraid that the sight may affect the baby badly!!!!
At that very moment, aunty patted the sofa next to her and said 'aao baitho yeh dekho...bada hi interesting plot hai!!' (come sit..see this - it has a very interesting plot!!)   :-)