Pregnant and DREAMING!!!

In terms of fantasy quotient, pregnant women's dreams and nightmares can make Steven Spielberg look pale. I used to boast about having the soundest sleep in the world with no recollection whatsoever of any dreams at all...and then I got preggie and this self image that I had created so painstakingly, got shattered into a million dreams!!


I have now been made capable by my pregnant state to see the most weird and fantastic dreams and nightmares that have included the following till date -  horror (most common theme); thrill; sex; drama; comic book heroes who have by some scientific experiment become pregnant (imagine Phantom pregnant); lions; Salman Khan (don't ask me why); science fiction plots involving babies with special powers; my boss (again, don't ask me why); my husband and the rest of the family; vampires; babies with tails; forest; toilet; ultrasound images in technicolour; my baby getting exchanged for another one in the hospital;... and some other unmentionable ones... Yes...that sums it all, at least till now.


Obviously, having being jolted to wakefulness almost every night by this weirdness, the researcher in me got interested in this topic (sleeplessness being the other factor besides academic curiosity) and I studied at least a dozen articles about 'pregnancy and dreams'. I was amazed to discover the wealth of information that 's available (it seems as if pregnant women do nothing else but dream). There are websites and research articles dedicated to this topic, that tell you the interpretation of these dreams... for example what it means if you see 2 kittens; 5 cubs; 9 armed babies etc in your dreams (yes- to that last detail). 


The websites claimed that the themes of most dreams are common among pregnant people, probably because all of us go through a similar gamut of anxiety and hormonal ups and downs. Dreams of preggie women have also been classified as 1st, 2nd and 3rd trimester dreams for purposes of systematic research - really, I had no idea that what I was experiencing was worth such extensive scientific research. So, I felt like a wonderful citizen of the world when I contributed two of my bizarre dreams to one such online forum in order to add to their collection (felt so fulfilled - my pregnancy dreams would be discussed and investigated and will help the world on its way to a new scientific era where people would understand dreams seen by pregnant women!). 


The best part was how relieved I felt when I read the dreams that other pregnant women had posted. All my fears were put at rest about any of my horrifying dreams ever coming true as the ones seen by some other women crossed all boundaries of bizarre. A new Oscar for best imagination needs to be instituted for some of these pregnant women!! 


I am not sharing my dreams here as some of them have the potential to make people sick and I don't want you all spending the rest of the month cleaning the crevices of your keyboards. But I will let you know the six commonest themes that most women see:

1. Water : ocean, bowl of water, toilet bowl, fish in water, swimming pool etc (related with anxiety/ knowledge about baby swimming in the amniotic fluid)
2. Husband/ Partner with other women :mostly super-models with silicon largely figuring in their figures (related with insecurity about your changing body/weight gain etc)
3. Appearance of baby or Baby in distress : baby as a kitten/cub/dinosaur - anything but human; being born with excessive hair; born an adult; being exchanged for another baby in the hospital; having more than required body parts; torturous delivery with a painful expression on the baby's face; baby plopping into the toilet bowl while you are going on with your daily tasks etc (and you thought that horror films were scary!!!) (seen by almost all preggie women - the good news is that there is substantial research to show that this is the best way to release anxiety and tension that women have about their unborn babies and women who see such dreams mostly have hassle free deliveries!)
4. Evolution: seeing one celled creatures changing shapes and sizes till they reach human form - passing from fish...reptile...amphibian... avian...to mammalian state (signifies the process of the baby growing inside the womb starting from a single cell)
5. Freedom: seeing open fields, airplanes, kites, yourself running or participating in adventure sports such as sky diving etc (signifying anxiety about new role as parent and loss of current independence. Fathers- to be also see these dreams!)
6. Change: a new room or balcony in your house; a new car; you staying in another city; you as a queen/ some other profession; you and your partner being reborn as some animals/aliens etc (I know this is weird) (signifies a new event about to happen in life - the baby)

Yes most of the dreams are actually nightmares but they come with the pregnancy package...so, 'sweet and sour dreams to you dear preggies!!'


The scientific explanation for these vivid dreams is, 'the anxiety and apprehension of the pregnant woman (regarding changes in her life/ body; or about the safe arrival of her baby; or its health etc) manifests into dreams'..of course- this does not explain my seeing Salman Khan in a dream. But then you can't explain everything in life! Can you? :-)


Some images from my dreams:

Well I saw a pregnant Phantom and Diana feeding him fruit

Lions and me giving birth to lion cubs - a litter!

I saw a toilet bowl and also the baby plopping in it!

Yes I saw Salman Khan - three times - each time without his shirt and with a baby!

Some interesting websites about pregnancy and dreams if you want to research further:

Very interesting pregnancy dreams decoded

Research Paper

An A-Z guide to interpreting pregnancy dreams

what not to say to pregnant women on bed rest

Having been stuck on the third floor of a lift-less apartment building on account of my slightly complicated pregnancy, I have now compiled a list of TOP 10 things that make bed ridden pregnant women even more miserable...

(this is the small text which people tend to miss in contracts and insurance documents - but is the most significant. Though I have mentioned here how I got irritated/miserable with what my friends and family said to me during my bed rest phase, without them, I couldn't have survived it...They have been my pillar of strength..my connection to the rest of the world...I cherish all the visits and phone calls that they have made/will make...Without them, I would really  be one miserable creature)


One friend asks me: 'Have you seen this latest movie (in this case it was ZNMD- Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara)? By God- its to die for- what amazing cinematography- what story- superb acting...you must see it- its just your kind of movie and you know what happens when this hero gets....'.(HELLO!!- sorry to interrupt but didn't I tell you just 2 seconds ago that I have been advised bed-rest by the doc!!). It is these kinds of friends who make you break your principles and watch pirated CDs...the government must arrest these people to bust the pirated CD racket!!

Another friend asks me in a very concerned voice: 'Did you get to watch this movie?' and before he can go any further, I say- 'Oh yes- I got it from a friend and watched it here..' He made a face that would make any zombie insecure and said, 'What!! you watched it on this tiny computer screen!!! On the big screen its another experience altogether' (WELL thanks!!  This information was really crucial to the development of my baby!! and another thanks for pointing out that my computer is size-zero and good for nothing)


A friend came to see me and to cheer me up she said, 'You don't know what a bundle you are saving...you are on bed rest- you don't need clothes!!' (she meant 'new clothes' to go with my changing size - but I had been looking forward to go about the town in stylish maternity clothes in which you can have as many tyres of fat oozing out of your body and yet people will give you those adoring glances and sweet smiles!!) So here I am in my rags...saving money on clothes...but getting whooping phone bills on account of the 'resting' state ( but the tongue never rests)...not to mention the gigantic AC bill as nowadays I feel that I'll melt in the heat. So, clothes or no clothes...expenditure is a norm when you are pregnant whether mobile or on bed rest!!

Number four is the most interesting as almost every friend who is a mom or dad has told me this: 'Abhi so lo jitna sona hai....baad mein taras jaaogi' meaning 'Sleep as much as you can while you have this chance...afterwards with the baby you won't get to sleep at all' (for those of you who are thinking exactly what problem could I have with this piece of good advice, I request you to transport yourselves to the days when we had our exams in school and we felt so sleepy and yet, in order to study, we had to keep our eyes open. Wouldn't it have been wonderful if we could sleep for one month and stay awake the next month when we had our exams??) Even if I sleep now (all the time as suggested), will it guarantee full energy and wide-eyed wakefulness once the baby is born?? Please tell me......please please...if yes, then I am ready to take some inspiration from 'Kumbhkaran'.


What can I say about this one: 'Please take a lot of rest' (Do you see me running a marathon or jumping around? Then why are you telling me to do exactly what I am doing 24X7 already?)

This one came from a friend who is also pregnant right now. She called me up and told me ' I went to this XYZ Spa today and got a relaxing facial and massage...feel like a million dollars...you know they have a special package to pamper pregnant women!' (waaaaaaaaaaaaaa!! this is me trying to cry and scream and pull my hair at the same time - difficult task - as I was also holding my phone listening to her) How could she do this to me- a knife in the heart!! I muttered 'Et tu Brute' under my breath and felt like Julius Caesar...I was sooooo jealous that my ears became warm. But then she told me that she went there because she had this very bad episode of morning sickness with a lot of puking and that she had been vomiting on and off every 3-4 hours and how her car seats had to be dry cleaned twice in a a week etc. So, she really needed some TLC (tender love n care)...Immediately the temperature of my ears returned to normal and I began sympathizing with her...though I really wanted to rub in the fact that I didn't even puke once in my preggie state!!!

This one is something that every pregnant woman hears from some source or the other....'you must sleep on time, eat on time, read good (they mostly mean spiritual) books, listen to good (here they mean meditative) music... All this will affect your baby......the baby will always sleep late if you sleep late etc etc. (Now as a resting preggie I really depend on those racy thrillers  to keep me company - and where is the thrill and mystery if they don't have a murder or two, at least one kidnapping, a rape etc???) (And why would I want my baby to listen to the recorded sound of water flowing over pebbles and birds chirping when s/he can experience it for real? As far as developing an appreciation for music goes, I think pregnant women should listen to all genres..) (And if the baby depends so much on my sleeping... my baby will surely be a lazy bum - a sloth in human garb...because the mother doesn't have a choice but to keep resting to bring her/him into this world! Suddenly, heredity will have no say and it won't matter if the mother and father are super-active otherwise) 


This one comes from my doctor friend (the one I've mentioned in a previous post). She keeps telling me that she knows of two such pregnant women who spent the entire 9 months on bed. They were not even allowed bathroom breaks like me and had a bed pan...She keeps telling me that I should be grateful that I am allowed to sit at the table and have my meals.. (Why? I also have the right to complain about my condition when I see pregnant women who go to office till the last day and I can't....why can't I compare myself to preggies who go and watch movies, go out for dinner...) So I will continue asking her 'Why me?' even if she keeps scolding me...more than 25 years of friendship give you many such exclusive rights. (yes you read correctly- 25years!!)

Do you know what a 'babymoon' is? I do now and will elucidate it here: A babymoon includes some ' "last hurrah" trips for parents-to-be providing the perfect setting to relax and reconnect as a couple before entering parenthood" .A pregnant friend (another one) calls up one day, jumping with joy, 'We are going for a babymoon to Bali'. Though I have to accept here that she did not know about the bed-rest clause in my pregnancy so she was just sharing her excitement which I could not share equally. (It is not easy spending all your time indoors...one gets really tired of the same walls, the same switchboard and tubelight and lamp and of course the same bed...however bright bed sheet one may use). Actually, pregnant women on bed rest must not feel bad about not being able to go on a babymoon because their doctors (like mine) must have given strict instructions with these two words loudest of all, 'No Sex'. My doctor  told me that the bed has to be used as a place of rest and nothing else for the next 6 months!!! Then she thought a little more and said, 'that doesn't open the option of doing it elsewhere in the house! You cannot risk going further than a cuddle or hug!!!!' IMAGINE!!! what opinion she must have had of me!!! Even if I would have made it to a babymoon on a stretcher, I would just be looking out of the hotel room window - May be I'll ask my husband to get a poster of an exotic beach location, stick it on the wall in front of me and dress up in beach wear and lie in front of the poster to give me the 'feel' - we could have the sound of sea waves in the background too!! (He'll kill me when he reads this!)


This usually comes from elder women in the family, aunties or didis- women more experienced in pregnancy than you..They tell you, 'Don't care about what the doctor says beta, you have to keep your husband's attention...All husbands are attracted towards other women when their wife is pregnant...after the third month there is no issue' Basically, they are encouraging me to do it with my hubby occasionally even when I am on bed rest. (Ok aunties so when did you all receive your doctorate in gynaecology? On one hand my doctor tells me to be careful even when I sit or stand so that there is minimum impact and on the other I am being cheered on for frequent humping (please excuse my language)). I was slightly bothered by this and asked my husband 'are you looking at other women nowadays?' He said 'that I do all the time...why is nowadays important?' so I asked him, 'do you find them more attractive than me? you know me being pregnant and all?' He answered 'Nobody in his right mind would answer 'yes' to that question! By the way, have you lost your mind or something'. He is right - I was being paranoid...On a more serious note, fathers-to-be have so much on their minds that even looking at other women amounts to additional work. Why do people always have to put men down to that level as if they are incapable of anything else. If it is important for the safety of the baby, its not a big deal for both the mother and father to go without sex - 'its just temporary and not impossible Aunty!!!'