Don't you wish that Men could be pregnant too?

NO - I did not forget the blogger password - nor did my labour start before time...I just became a full time mom to a toddler...my sister's daughter!!


The whole day passes in a blink...no time to blog....


Finally after almost a month's break - I am back....and my news is that the labour pains/ water break/ other alarms can go off any time for me now- my bag is ready but I am not!! Excited about having reached so close to finish line but also nervous that this finish line alternates as a 'start' line for a new phase in life!!!


OK...enough about me...now some serious discussion on why men should be pregnant too!!!


Through this post, I would like to present to you the most sensitive males in the world  - sea horses, pipe fish, sea dragons... (No...please don't pick up your phones to call me up to check my mental well-being). Actually, sea horses, pipe fish and sea dragons are the only creatures in the world where the males of the species gets pregnant!! What a blissful state of affairs for the sea mares, the female pipe fish and the she-sea-dragons!!
(I have already started praying to be born as a beautiful (female) leafy sea dragon or sea horse in my next life)... 

  

sea horse

So as a sexy sea-mare in my next life, once we (my sea horse and I) decide to have babies, the only thing I would have to do is to go and lay eggs in my partner's pouch. The eggs will get fertilized in the pouch and babies will grow in Daddy's tummy till they are smart enough to come out and face the world after many weeks!! Not only this - to make me deposit my eggs in his pouch, my sea horse will have to compete with other horses to make himself most attractive  for me!

leafy sea dragon

He will flash bright colours at me...change from yellow to pink to orange...just to please me and then....if I am pleased enough, we will perform a courtship dance that will last for several hours...spiralling up and down the water...before I deposit my eggs in him. Phew! that would be some extensive foreplay!! When gestation ends, the sea horse would have contractions (similar to labour but more like sneezing - if you click the link- you can see a video of this - only if you are interested in seeing a sea horse in labour and delivery) and tiny babies will emerge from the pouch!! Beautiful story!!

green pipefish

Okay!!! I know some of you want me to get over my National Geographic documentary mode...So coming back to the present reality...I am actually a pregnant human woman (is that even correct English??)!! How I wish there was some kind of biologically viable pregnancy sharing mechanism between me and my husband.. for e.g. if only he could be pregnant for one trimester! I am not saying this only because I want my pregnancy woes to be shared (that too of course!)...I also want him to feel the amazement.. the pure delight and wonder that I feel sometimes (one has to write such statements to add pathos to the story!!). I feel, men have not been given a fair deal in this respect..Some of the sensitive ones (like my husband) feel left out and don't know how to compensate for not being able to get pregnant..

It was while I was thinking about this unfair world and sea horses, that I noticed that my husband  was also showing some pregnancy-like symptoms such as bouts of moodiness and depression and was dreaming weird dreams..In fact he also developed some skin rash and had to visit a dermatologist. And I had thought that this is the only time in my life when I had the exclusive right to be the centre of everybody's attention!! The thoughts that crossed my mind were primarily 'if he has so many 'nakhras' and is exhibiting half the symptoms- he might as well be pregnant for half the time!!' Then a friend came and asked whether my hubby was experiencing 'phantom pregnancy symptoms'...Mere toe kaan khade ho gaye (literal translation in English is  'my ears stood up'!!). What 'phantom'??? Why not 'real'...I thought this must be a gimmick created by the male world..just to be part of the 'exclusive preggie club' that is only for women..


So, as usual, I started elaborate research on this topic - 'male pregnancy'. The crux, I present here:


I thought I could find some actual/scientific technique to share my pregnancy with my husband but all I found was mushy/squishy stuff about 'how husbands could be supportive during their wives' pregnancies'; 'what daddy-to-be should be doing' etc..(that doesn't even get close to being pregnant) and I also realized that if there was even a trace of such a technique available anywhere in the world, every woman under the sky would have known about it.

But, it soon got more interesting - I came across a website that is monitoring the pregnancy of a man - a Mr. Lee Mingwei who voluntarily became pregnant and you can find his ultrasounds/ daily diary/ BP etc. on this website.  It seems authentic -there is a hospital/ real doctors involved and this guy has been interviewed by Oprah!! But then I came across an article that said this was a hoax (hoax!! to fool whom?? and I am interested in knowing how they manufactured a hoax Oprah show?) 

Hoaxes aside, I found out that some transgender males have given birth to babies (they had the necessary equipment- the female reproductive system that they made full use of). And, just because they are transgender, they got to cover pages of magazines and their interviews splashed across tabloids- WHAT ABOUT US- pregnant women - nobody came to interview me...In fact I kept waiting for a phone call for something related to pregnancy - at least some survey.. that also did not happen...:-(


My main discovery was the 'Couvade's Syndrome' and I quote from a website: 'Have you recently caught your husband sneaking your favorite pregnancy foods from the pantry? Is he suddenly just as emotional and nauseous as you? The reason may be Couvade Syndrome.' So that was what was happening to my husband - ahem!! sounds very elite- this Couvade's thing - as if it is some award!! It is so common that there are articles about it all over the internet and also on the BBC site - 'Men suffer from phantom pregnancy' 

In extreme cases of this syndrome, men have been known to have labour pains...and also gain weight around the middle till the 9th month like pregnant women!! Thank God, my husband was only feeling nauseous...otherwise one can only imagine the confusion in the labour room..nurses trying to figure out who is going to deliver - me or the husband...and doctors flabbergasted to see a man with a long beard...or rather a pregnant man with a long beard (we could leave out the beard as 'pregnant man' causes sufficient surprise but the beard adds to the confusion - imagine people looking at the tummy then at the beard then again at the tummy then up at the beard then down at the tummy then again at the beard then....OK OK I'll stop...those of you with good imagination must have got the picture... ;-) 

 


For people who are further interested in this concept of men being pregnant or other interesting ways of having children, I want to recommend some wonderful books to read...
The Pregnant King by Devdutt Pattanaik
The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K Le Guin
The Ethan of Athos  by Lois McMaster Bujold
Woman on the Edge of Time by Marge Piercy